how to tick people off

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
    "DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
    "What?"
    "Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

may is gone

Can you believe it's almost June?
Where did this month go? I spent most of it
inside waiting on the rain to stop!
Hope your summer is a groove and you don't get too sunburned.
I am hoping to find some cool water to jump in soon....

Day of Infamy

Looking back and realizing that today is my wedding anniversary gives me a desire to crawl back into bed and start over. It was a sunny day, May 26th, 1979 when I took a plunge into darkness at a little Catholic chapel in Fox Meadows, little knowing the horrible mistake I was about to make that would change my life for the next eight years. That I survived to tell this story, so others could avoid my fate is all
I can do.

I can relate to the zookeeper who was bitten by the tiger two days ago. I wish him a speedy recovery and hope that next time he will get to bite back.

Robin is still rockin check out trowerpower.com

Robin Trower - The Fool and Me - Royal Oak, Detroit, 2008 from Trower Power on Vimeo.

Valkyrie

If you like historical war drama, go rent
Valkyrie today. Lots of suspenseful scenes
to keep you on the edge of your seat with a
great supporting cast.

the history of cannibis sativa

weekend is on the way

We are having the third week of Memphis in May
this week, featuring the world famous barbeque contest.
Teams from all over the world come to participate. This week is another
rainy week however and I think it will hurt the attendance some.

Happy Birthday

I wanted to wish a belated birthday wish to Salvador Dali and may you be with us for many more years....

See the new STAR TREK NOW!!!!